#oneNightONLY

Published December 21, 2016 by Stephanie

It was Saturday night and as usual she purposely placed her phone on silent. She didn’t want to be bothered with any texts and phone calls from her friends urging her to go out. She was a quiet home body who would rather stay in and read a book verses getting all glamed up to go partying. And as usual she would just pretend the next day that her phone died or she fell asleep and missed everyone’s calls. It had just turned 8pm when there was a loud knock at her door. It stunned her because she never had company over especially not at night. She creeped over to the door and was relieved yet irritated that it was three of her friends staring back at her through the peephole. She sighed the deepest sigh and opened to let them in. “Hey girl whats up?” the loudest of the trio exclaimed. She shrugged and quickly asked what the intrusion was all about. The three girls were fed up always getting the cold shoulder and stood up. They were determined to get thier homebody friend dressed up and out the house to go kick it. Naturally she refused and was hesitant. But with some very persuasive coaxing and the promise of not staying out too late she agreed.
In no time as her friends not quietly waited she was dressed to kill. She let her messy ponytail of tendrils fall to her shoulders with one side pinned back. And slipped into an all black form fitting dress that showed off all her curves tunnels and highways any man could get lost for miles trying to navigate through. It was simple to match her personality yet naturally breath taking. When she exited her room to return to her friends they started hooting and whistling. She immediately turned red. It was very rare for her peers to see her out of sweats and gym shoes. She was finally dressed like a “girl”. They all hopped in loud mouth’s car and preceded on to their night of fun! About 10 minutes into the car ride she asked which club they were going to. Loud mouth yelled towards the backseat “Club O”. When the words left her mouth all eyes were immediately on her, watching for her reaction. “Club O? What? Isn’t that a strip club?” she asked nervously. The whole car erupted in laughter. They all started talking at once trying to reassure their goody too shoe friend that it was all good. They purposely waited til the car ride to inform her where they were going. She would’ve never agreed to go to such a place. They jokingly made fun of her the rest of the trip there.
When they finally arrived it was packed. It was ladies night so a male review show was taking place. Ladies young and old crowded the stage with fistfuls of dollar bills ready to see men dance and sling dick around. It was crazy. They were just as thirsty as men are. Of course the three amigos were right with the crowd of horny women. She however stayed to the side and looked on. There were a lot of good looking dancers there. They were all tall and muscular. Some were smooth and chocolatety, a few were carmel brown with pretty eyes and some were white with beautiful smiles. It was like standing outside the ice cream truck deciding on which flavor you wanted. When in reality you wanted to be greedy and slurp and eat them all up. The fat kid in her was coming out.
After the review show a second addition to the club opened up and all the ladies were able to hit the dance floor to mingle and dance. It was nice. The DJ was doing his thang and the bar stayed open for drink orders. The quartet was chilling and having a good time. Including the home body. She was out on the floor getting it. Dropping it like it was on fire. “Ladies look” one of the girls yelled out to the others. Standing at the bar were some of the dancers (fully dressed) that were in the show. Instead of leaving they decided to stay and hang out for drinks. Of course they were surrounded by a flock of dehydrated ass women dying for their attention. But what did they expect? You can’t just show all the goods and think bitches wouldn’t want a sample. She couldn’t blame the chicks for trying. But it was humorous watching them throw themselves at the dancers.
She had got so exhausted and sweaty from dancing she decided to sit the next song out. She found an empty spot at the bar and she parked all her hotness down to cool off. She wasn’t even there for 5 minutes before she was approached by a whisper in her ear “hey beautiful, what’s your name?” Startled she turned around and a big smile quickly filled her face. It was one of the dancers from the show, Scorpio. She introduced herself with a handshake, he took that as the green light to sit next to her. She didn’t mind at all though.He was EVERYTHING! About 6’3 with a beard and low fade. Broad shoulders with tatts covering his carmel colored complexion. He was handsome. He kept his brown eyes attentively on her the whole time he sat close focused in on their conversation. It was small talk nothing big. He asked her age, who she came with and if she enjoyed the show. She was intrigued by all the questions yet she still answered. Half way through one of her responses he interrupted ” I like the way your mouth moves when you speak”. She immediately felt herself turn red from blushing.” Thank you” she replied. He leaned in closer while brushing his fingers up and down her forearm “leave with me back to my room. I’m here only til the morning and I want you”. His voice was deep and his touch was soothing. She could only imagine what it would be like to have him all over her. She never responded, instead he could sense the hesitation in her. He took those wandering fingers and begun caressing her legs slowly. Stroking up and down softly inching his way to her inner thighs now gently teasing at her panties. He whispered in her ear “come on let’s go”. She was in a trance, hypnotized. As if she was under a spell that couldn’t be broken. She obeyed as he took her by the hand and motioned for her to follow. Just as she started she saw her friends who waved her over to them. They had been looking for her. They rushed over to her and the spell was broken. She snapped back and thought bout how crazy and dangerous it was to just leave a club with a stranger. It was way out of her goody too shoe league. Scorpio noticed the halt and turned to ask “baby what’s wrong?”
“Baby? ” one of her friends exclaimed
Ashamed she quickly filled her friends in on how she was leaving and going back to the hotel with the stripper. Thier mouths hit the floor in disbelief. And now they were the ones with the barrage of questions for her. They couldn’t believe the quiet homebody who never took risks was going home from the club with someone. Naturally they asked if they could come, Scorpio agreed.
About an hour later they were all at the hotel in a private suite. They were accompanied by the other strippers from the show and an entourage of all types of people. It was a mini impromptu party. They had room service popping with bottles and small finger foods for everyone. It was cool, more excitement than she would have had on her couch curled up in a book. As she stood surveying the room Scorpio came from behind her and wrapped his arm around her. He bent his tall self down and whispered to her ” come on, I’m ready for you now”. Her body heated up like an oven in preparation of what was about to begin. He escorted her out to another room a few doors down where they were alone.She was nervous and he sensed it. Nervous about letting go of all her inhibitions. She was about to freely give her body away to someone who she didn’t know and most likely would never see again. The idea intimidated her but also excited her. It was exciting for her to do something bold and daring. Something out of the box and out of character. Scorpio sat down on the bed and instructed her to take off her clothes.She was of course shocked by the request but did as she was told and stripped down. He watched with a smile on his face as she took her time coming out of that little black dress. She stopped and took a deep breath before dropping her panties and bra. When she started Scorpio shot up and started undressing in a hurry. He strapped on protection and before she knew it she was bent over the nearby dresser holding on bracing herself for what was coming next. She heard him chuck up a mouth full of spit and spat it out on his dick. She thought “what the hell?” Then Scorpio slowly inched that now slippery wet dick slowly into her ass. She gasps as he cautiously entered her. She had never had anal before and her body expressions must’ve showed it. He grabbed her by the neck and tilted her head back towards him “relax I got you baby” he assured her. When he was all the way in he unleashed slow rhythmically strokes in and out gripping firmly onto her ass and waist. She felt herself loosen up and started to enjoy herself. He fucked hard but it felt good. It was an experience like no other. When he got real into it he grabbed onto her breasts and used them as handlebars as he rode her ass in circles digging deeper and deeper. She could take no more and moaned out in pleasure…
About a hour later after their sexapade they both laid side by side in their efforts to recuperate. A minute or two into it he turned to her and kissed her passionately. It ignited her soul on fire. When she was released from the inferno she smiled exposing dimples and uttered “I have to go”. Scorpio gave a puzzled look as he watched her start dressing. “Why so soon,what’s wrong? ” he questioned.
“Nothing,I just don’t want this to be more than what it is. We live in two different worlds. We would never work out. I’m boring and you obviously live an exciting life. I don’t even know your real name or where your from” she replied back sadly.
He understood and accepted her honesty.Made him want her even more but she was hell bent on leaving and never seeing him again. He gave her a card and told her to call when she made it home. She smiled as she took it and said “ok”.
When she caught up with her friends they were too wasted to drive home so she made sure every one got home safely. She had only got intoxicated with dick not alcohol so She was cool to drive around. The best part was they were also to drunk to question her about her “experience ” with Scorpio. When she made it home herself she showered and did as she was told. She called her rendezvous lover to inform him she made it back safely. Before hanging up he told her he had never had a one night stand before. She indulged that she hadn’t either. “What happens now?” He asked.
“We hang up and remember our good times together,even though it was limited” she answered.
Before doing so he broke all the rules and told her his real name was Jaylen and that in the morning he would be going back home to Memphis. He added that he would miss her and wished they could’ve spent more time together. After that there was silence, he hung up.
Months later on Christmas a long distance number called her. She assumed it was a telemarketer and didn’t answer.It was followed up with a text message. She then knew differently. The message was from Jaylen wishing her a merry Christmas. She responded back wishing him the same. And then noting. She was amazed he didn’t reply back. She deleted the number and the message so she wouldn’t be tempted later to contact him. But he did reply back. Months later on her birthday, sporadically throughout the year and EVERY Christmas. Sometimes when he does I do reply back. I wonder what he’ll say to me this Christmas.

Me All By Myself 

Published October 23, 2016 by Stephanie

Everyone got a story to tell
A passageway into their soul
Where all their emotions are held
My cup runneth over and all my inhibitions have spilled
I fear the thought of my dreams being unfulfilled
Cause sometimes I’m backed up against the wall
And it feels like all my progress has come to a stall
Like a dark cloud hovering over me and I just lost it all
The warmth of sunshine is far away
So in the shadows of despair is where I must stay
I get so deep down I don’t think God can even hear me when I pray
I’m lost there is no comfort
All I know is sorrow and anguish
I’m always talking shit, muthafuckers think I have my own language
That’s why people always tip toe around me trying not to make me upset or get anxious
When I’m pissed I get turnt
Start acting wild and rambunctious
In my head my screws are all loose
That’s why I act up and malfunction
What more would you expect?
I’m a product of a no good dad and a mom who ain’t want me
So of course there’s a little dysfunction
Some days my judgement is hazy
cause I deal with bullshit on the daily
And all these niggas be on me I swear these niggas annoy me
I guess the crazy bitches be tasty
Cause I get slurped up like biscuits and gravy.                                                                     But I don’t pay them no mind.                     I just stick to my grind.                                   Stay to myself and stay focus                         Me by myself with just I, is lethal dose when all combined

Soft and Humble

Published October 10, 2016 by Stephanie

The ex once told me that after almost loosing my life along with my son who was born 3 months early I changed. He told me I’ll always be crazy lol BUT I’m softer, more humble to life and my surroundings. I didn’t get it then but over time and especially now it makes sense to me. I’ve always been upset my whole life. Everyday, every minute, every second. Outside looking in every one assumes I have it made and I live this great happy fun life. But I don’t and it’s dark. It’s dark and consumed with so many secrets, empty gaps, and pain. No one knows my story. I’m a book judged by the cover that quickly gets flipped through but never thoroughly read. So I’m angry, bitter, upset and mad at the world everyday. I’ve endured so much misery and been through so much how could I not? Through all the horrible situations I’ve encountered I’ve always stood tall and strong. I’m a strong woman. But almost loosing my son broke me. And, the thought of my 2 daughters living life without me was scary. I became more softer and humble because I took a step back to analyze my life and see how blessed I am. I’m alive, my son survived and my girls are with us. It made me see that I shouldn’t be mad at the world. Instead I should be out enjoying life and embracing the world. After that ordeal I stopped letting a lot of things get to me. I was much calmer and clear headed when negative and/or confrontational situations arose. I became a better me. I wanted to do better. But over time I felt myself slowly slipping back into my old ways. I think mainly because of how I handle stress and I feel like I’m under pressure to be great.I come across as being bitchy, mean, rude and evil. But yesterday was the complete opposite. I felt vulnerable and soft like when I was in the hospital trying to thrive with my son. Yesterday my little brother died. He was only 27, I cried all day. He was such a wonderful person and my girls loved him.Everyone loved Dante. It was a hard day and the funeral is gonna be worst. There’s gonna be people there I haven’t seen in years ( people I purposely stayed away from). I also cried and prayed all day about that. Some things are better left in the past. Yesterday further humbled my troubled soul. Made me appreciate living and all the people In my life. But why? Why do I have to go through tragedy to appreciate what I have and to not be upset everyday? I’m making a vow to myself to start becoming more forgiving. Forgive myself of all my sins and all pain casted upon me from others. Hopefully it will allow me to make it through the visitation, aid in cleansing my mind and ease the sorrow in my heart.

RIP DANTE JACKSON

 JANUARY 30,1989 – October 9, 2016

#thoughts 

Published September 19, 2016 by Stephanie

The last two weeks have been more stressful than ususal….But it’s a new week, a new day and I have a better positive outlook on my situation. When bad things happen you can either let them break you down or allow them to help make you into something greater. I choose to be great. I hope all of you also allow the positive in and the negative out to have a good week!

BASIC BITCH

Published August 27, 2016 by Stephanie

Trying to treat a BADD BITCH like she basic?
I’ll pull your card and leave your heart looking all anorexic
With me you niggas can’t talk that talk walking around trying to flex
I’m already ahead of you, Don’t make me get reckless!
I’m the shit, I’m a queen stomping the pavement all majestic
Boy, you ain’t bout to work my nerve, messing up my lip gloss making shit more hectic
So, I’m gonna keep it poetic
But let you know you just lost out and that’s why you looking all pathetic
Now your a has been nigga post watching me with my new fly hot ass nigga
He ain’t no lame ass nigga, he the brand new you looking nigga, you just bitter
And now your quick to yell out that I ain’t shit
That you were only in it just to get it
But that was only in the beginning
Cause you got commited once you hit it
And I had you on your hands and knees begging me can you eat it
You want me to be your woman
That’s why you putting in time and you cooking
But when I ask you start fronting
Then get mad when I start looking
Pretend like you ain’t hurt, like it ain’t nothing
When in fact it’s really something
Your putting up a wall, I know your bluffing
I can sense it through your angry texts, it’s me your really wanting
Before you close your eyes at night you probably wonder who I’m loving
Who getting all of me, who dick I’m sucking
But that’s your own fault , shouldn’t have been stressing
Should’ve valued that you had me, thankful for your blessings
Always giving out advice, but caught up in your own misfortunate life lesson
Keep yourself humble, never over think it’s not complicated
Never treat a BADD BITCH like she basic

THANK YOU ❤

Published July 30, 2016 by Stephanie

I’m often asked “who runs the facebook page for your blog?”. I always laugh while smirking and reply ME. I write all the stories/poems and do ALL the posting of everything. I put my all in what I do, 110%. That’s why I’m very appreciative of all the praise and feedback I receive. I have people from all over messaging me on Facebook and texting my phone letting me know how dope they think my work is.When I first started my page I didn’t think anyone would care about what I had to say or even would take me seriously. But almost 300 followers later I’m convinced people enjoy what I do and love my creativity. Thank you sooo much for allowing me to share my world by expressing myself the best way I know how.

                                                                   -Stephanie

              

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